Seriously.
Our Best Bites sends me an email every day with a recipe that is amazing, along with really fun commentary by the bloggers. They're giving away stuff this week to thank their fans. You click on the picture of the item, write why you should win it, and then sit back and hope. Here are my entries:
To win a season DVD of one of several shows:I cannot tell you how many times we watch Modern Family and just cringe and then laugh and then re-watch a scene. Amazing writing on that show!
Friday Night Lights is our special “date night at home” show. I’ll make a tasty dinner that my wife and I will eat on the floor. OMG, the episode where they put Julie in the car to drive away to college about killed us. My oldest daughter will be fifteen in January; where does the time go?
To win a digital bathroom scale:I had a minor heart catheter procedure back in late December, and thought I should take a few weeks off from the gym to avoid having my femoral artery burst open while attempting to lift some incredibly massive and impressive amount of weight. So, last week, my wife told me to put on my workout clothes, that my “few weeks” were over and it was time to get back to the gym. I’ve had two weeks of disgustingly petite little aerobic instructors kicking my 41-year-old backside all over the studio. I don’t love our bathroom scale (mostly because it’s a lying piece of…well, it’s a big liar), but I bet if we had a sexy little red number like that I’d be sneaking in there after every meal just to check out the numbers.
To win a $100 gift card to TargetAre you kidding me? This store is like The Holy City for my wife and kids and I. Need a birthday gift? target. Need something for living room decor? Target. Video game? Fishing equipment? Teacher supplies? Stuff for my classroom? Target Target Target Target. I swear, they have a running timeline of my waistline over the years from the security camera feeds. When I started going there, I fit inside the dot of the logo. Now? Lucky if I can squeeze into the largest ring. You know what I’d get with $100 to spend at Target? Stuff to cook with. Which is part of why I’m dealing with that largest ring.
To win a brushed-stainless Cuisinart ice cream makerAch, such brushed stainless beauty! I only just this Sunday came home from Costco with a Cuisinart/Keurig coffee maker for my darling bride! Can you imagine the timeless beauty of my kitchen with two such matching works of art sitting side-by-side, gleaming smugly while I work in my prep area with the garlic? Chocolate chip cookies served with fresh ice cream and a steaming mug of coffee? Are you kidding me? Sadly, I have no ice cream maker, and so my beautiful wife must suffer through cookies and coffee served with Haagen-Daaz ice cream. It simply isn’t good enough for her.
To win a 6-quart KitchenAid mixerI…need a moment to compose myself. You see, when I was a little boy, my mother used to make desserts with a KitchenAid mixer. I have fond memories of licking beaters covered with chocolate butter-cream frosting or batter for her (oh my GAWD) lemon bars. Sadly, my own children must lick French Silk Pie filling from the beaters of a hand-held mixer built back when I was a small child, myself. Certainly, they grin in delight and ask how much more refrigeration is needed, but I can tell. I can tell that there is a certain, yes, I’ll say it, embarrassment, that comes from knowing that they aren’t licking French Silk Pie filling from the beaters of a real KitchenAid stand-alone mixer. The dancing sparkles of delight in their eyes, the giggles of young teenage girls enjoying their favorite dessert made by a proud father, these things are tinged with just a bit of sadness. Please, for the children, for the French Silk Pies and the chocolate butter-cream frostings, search your hearts and select me as the winner of this true work of culinary art.
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