Holding it together. Barely.

Jul. 12th, 2017 08:47 am
tanuki_green: (Sam - Flawed Dog)
[personal profile] tanuki_green
 So, I live with cats, all of which are not mine.  But that doesn't mean I'm not theirs.  Alice has always been a lovely cat.  I've known her much longer than the year I've been living with her.  She's taken to following me down to my room when I get home from work and demanding I sit on my bed quietly with her, giving her pets.  I've grown very fond of her.

She now has cancer.  And I'm not coping well.  Tomorrow she goes back into the vet tomorrow to see what kind of cancer it is.  The cancer is in her stomach and there's really only two types it could be at this point, and all signs point to Lymphoma in her stomach.  She got a feeding tube put in over the weekend this last weekend.  That's been an interesting experience, let me tell you.

So, I'm watching her owner try to deal with this and be tortured by this but doing the best they can for Alice, always keeping Alice in mind.  I'm trying to be strong in front of her and in front of Alice and I can feel a breakdown on the horizon.  I stayed home from work yesterday which meant that I got to help with feeding (through the tube) and I also got extra cuddles from Alice.  It was needed.

Today I find myself back at work today and the tears are waiting just behind my eyes, waiting at any moment to push forward and drench my face.  If you know of the situation and you know of the owner please be kind there, and also to me.  Again, not my cat, but how can I not love her?

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